I Don’t Believe in Cupid Anymore……

Love is a joke….it lift you up for a while then drop you on hard ground.. wanted to do this post for sometime now… but never seem to get the courage to do so…but well after a few stuff happen around me… I don’t really believe True Love is available for everyone…do they exist??.. that one I can agree to…but is it for everyone? No … I don’t think so…. Maybe the Big Guy up there wants us to understand this…

3 years ago, I build a wall around my heart….cause I say to myself.. hey stop hurting it…udah ler wei sakit dow….and I was happy….how happy am I? Very happy indeed…everything was just for fun… nothing more nothing less….and all this time my heart grow stronger each day….being thankful for what I have ..why would I need anything else??…. Just focus on what I have….

Tapi kekadang terasa gak nak merindu dan dirindui….kekadang nak gak bermanja-manja..cudling….”guling2” “Gapus2”(Slang Sabah) tapi apakan daya…. Everytime I open my heart the risk of it getting hurt terlalu besaq….so this is me….. I am happy just like this….making other’s around me happy…. And stop asking me who I am involved with… cause if I am really involved with anyone… I rather keep it to myself. Cause even if I got hurt.. or If my heart are broken again.. you would never know… I put a smiling face…making sure that the people around me are happy…..this misery is mine and I alone should accept and handle it…

This is me …..

The Huggable Ben……

P/s….nope it doesn’t mean I stop being naughty……huhuhuhuhuhu…!!!!

Handbags Vs Backpack…..

Dah dekat sebulan tak buat weight…. Adei… selepas kejadian bulan lepas dimana terlalu excited sanggat main gym sampai injured shoulder muscle….but after three week sakit tak hilang2 gak, setakat kurang sakit ada ler…. Huhuhuhu..risau gak banyak sanggat makan pain killer ni… so gi jumpa doc balik nak mintak nasihat cam ner… perlu gi acupuncture ker?....The doc ask “ ada bawa benda2 berat tak kat shoulder?” “tak wat weight dah dekat tiga minggu dah….” “benda lain tak angkat ker?” “ Nope Just backpack jer…” “ owh….try not to put so much burden on your shoulder ben..” “ok I bring sling bag ler..” “nope sling beg pun put pressure…better not” “erk….so nak guna apa gi opis…..?” “ use hand bag…” “whut??????”

Adei… cam ner plak ni…..huhuhuhu tak leh ler wei… tapi fendi nyer hand bags tue nampak usefull gak, tapi kan…. I am so a Back Pack Person…huhuhu takkan nak bawa handbags kot gi opis…..huhuhuhu ……cedera parah punya pasal…..

Putrajaya dah jadi pusat untuk konsert…dan aktiviti best2…hari ni ada aktiviti “NITE-TON” ala-ala marathon malam gitew… ramai gak join… tapi paling best time runner semua lari2, lagu2 best blasting giler babai nyer kuat huhuhuhu……Idzuan ko tak nak bawa band ko buat show kat sini ker? Huhuhuhu……..

Tak dapat siapkan redecoration ngan system formatting untuk my workstation…so sok kene gak datang awal kene redeco and reformat balik semua…..korang tgk perubahan isnin ni yer.. huhuhu ……

The Huggable ben

The Spanish Guitar and The Treasure

I don’t know why this song have being playing in my head since last nite…adei rasa lonely sanggat…..masuk opis plak…Meja clear jer… keje dah selesai…bos attend meeting lagi ler sepi….keje hakiki pun dah siap kat atas….tgu mr postmen jer ambik…last2 a lonely morning at the office… with this song….playing over and over again in my head……

Spanish Guitar By Toni Braxton

A smoky room, a small cafe
They come to hear you play
And drink and dance the night away
I sit out in the crowd
And close my eyes
Dream you're mine
But you don't know
You don't even know that I am there

I wish that I was in your arms
Like that Spanish guitar
And you would play me through the night
'Till the dawn
I wish you'd hold me in your arms
Like that Spanish guitar
All night long, all night long
I'd be your song, I'd be your song

Steal my heart with every note you play
I pray you'll look my way
And hold me to your heart someday
I long to be the one that you caress with
tenderness
And you don't know
You don't even know that I exist

I wish that I was in your arms
Like that Spanish guitar
And you would play me through the night
'Till the dawn
I wish you'd hold me in your arms
Like that Spanish guitar
All night long, all night long
I'd be your song, I'd be your song

Te sientas entre la gente
Cierras tu ojos
Y suenas que soy tuyo
Pero yo no siquiera se que estas ahi
Me gustaria tenerte entre mis brazos amor

I sit out in the crowd
And close my eyes
Dream you're mine
And you don't know
You don't even know that I exist

I wish that I was in your arms
Like that Spanish guitar
And you would play me through the night
'Till the dawn
I wish you'd hold me in your arms
Like that Spanish guitar
All night long, all night long
I'd be your song, I'd be your song

The Treasure….(notes inspired by the ELECTRA Movie)

I was a new treasure once.. a treasure which come every once a while, and where I cause a lot of havoc toward the world…where treasure hunter fought over me….everyone wanted to learn what so special about this treasure….. and after a while and all that research by all that treasure hunter….. they come to term, where they think that they already learn enough from this treasure. And now lot more new treasure, rare gems are appearing…. And this old gems, this old treasure got forgotten I guess….I ask myself, why was I the first treasure to appear not when the world was most exciting than when I first appear..?, I realize… as a previous treasure.. this old gems serve as guide to the new gems…. Sitting at the pedestal this old gems acquiring more secret and value…value which the treasure hunter once thought they had finally figure out….don’t get me wrong, treasure hunter still search for this old gems..but this time this old gems turn the table around, cause this time this treasure choose which treasure hunter should find the secret…the secret of this old gems, this old treasure… huhuhu cam buat novel plak… korang yang tak paham tgk ceta Electra dulu baru korang paham maksud ben…huhuhuhu…..

The Full Moon Shower……

A tradition where on the full moon we pay our respect to our ancestor by taking a bath under the full moon around the prepare ancestor altar….. begitu lar kiranya explaination in English huhuhu…..

Malam tadi mmg agak down memori lane… huhuhu…..teringat zaman muda remaja… 16 tahun gitew baru abis PMR… baru nak kenal dunia luar…dapat pengalaman2 yang indah dan menarik…huhuhhuhu…… nak tahu pengalaman2 pe.. kene ceta face2face ler mana bleh tulis dalam notes…..tapi pengalaman when masih innocent sanggat ler… huhuhuhu buat notes pun pipi kte jadi merah huhuhuhuhu…..

My Pet Buffalo dah ada new baby buffalo dah balik baru upload Photo huhuhu ……

My Crystal Search tak berapa berjaya… terlalu banyak crytal masak dah… mmg cantek tapi takde originality…..so well tak dapat semua yang dicari but yes dapat gak….

Nak simpan Beard cam Robby Romero….jambang cam bear gitu… tapi tetiba Grandmum cakap..nanti nampak cam “Panjahat” aka bad guy….. “whut??? but grandmum…..!!” nope she doesn’t like her grandson to have to thick facial hair at all… so tak leh ler buat mcm bear mcm robby , have to be 15yo forever….huhuhuhu… hey when 15yo pun banyak pengalam masam-masam manis huhuhu… belas2 lagi umur time tue..huhuhuhu…. …

Seem nothing much had happen….but It was a great break for once after all this while….

Balik sudah bisuk, siou lar kepada kawan2 yang inda sampat jumpa…kta minum2 lain kali kio jgn ko susah hati huhuhu……

And Back to my hectic working life once again….

Father’s Day Notes….

Its Father’s day and for the whole of last week, I can’t stop thinking nak bagi ape kat Bapa,Ayah ngan dad ben…..huhuhu… This is not as easy as mother’s day… cause you cant give candy to them…so tak sesuai.. huhuhu… was thinking of maybe a Cuban Cigar? Bapa ben musti suka but my mum would smack me .. and yelling “risk factor ben, risk factor!!!” betul gak.. cannot ler…For Ayah plak no don’t think so..ayah don’t smoke and so does dad…so no Cuban cigar for them too..huhu… wait, maybe a tie?... Bapa ben dah retired so I don’t think he would like a tie…..the only time I saw Ayah wear a tie was in a picture when he got his Anugerah cermerlang in 2006….Dad would probably like it..but.. erm…I do not know how to choose a tie…since I don’t use them myself huhuhu….. maybe a Football Jersey… Bapa Ben tgk Badminton… I am not sure if Ayah minat bola sepak…Dad is fully committed to Bowling …so yeah tak sesuai gak…..

Then it got me thinking..why am I trying to get something that is not my style? Huhuhu…. So Pa…..wait until Ben balik kio…Lunch at Gayang ok you choose the dishes!! Huhuhu.. Ayah..kne tgu ben balik opis yer… ada ler ben bawa balik tue… and Dad.. I am gonna get you that.. Ruyi Crystal..(laboratory made yer dad can’t really afford the jade one hehehe…) huhuhu..good for your desk…and good feng shui gak.. huhuhu….

So to all the dad out there..Happy Father’s Day… I hope you enjoy your day today…..and I guess you guys wish I am your son rite? Wakakakakakaka…..

P/s Najmi and Izzat..udah ler ngan Ps2..tue… gi tolong ayah hari ni yer…huhuhu…

Penat ..tapi Gumbira…huhuhuhu…..

Yeap Hari ni penat skit… awal pagi tadi agak seday gak sebab gelang Tiger eyes ben putus dan beteraburan di atas platform LRT… ntah ler cam ner boleh kene sepit antara pintu tue… secara tiba jer pintu tue snap ben OTW out huhhuhuhu…. First time kene sepit pintu LRT…huhuhu.. malu gak skit but whatever ler….

Hari ni banyak duduk menunggu.. kerana suara ben hilang akibat cuba meniru kelantangan suara Jacqueline Victor (kunun..sebenarnya akibat demam, sore throat ler huhuhu…) ben tak leh ganas2 hari ni so… banyak mengenang kenangan2 indah yang ben tak leh lupa…dapat peluk2 …kiss2…. Guling2….ops..huhuhu Obscene plak Notes ari ni huhuhuhu… But yeah kenangan yang ben akan cherish seumur hidup ben…Thank you for the memories…….

Sepanjang hari senyum jer ben..walaupun gelang crystal tue putus.. .. banyak fond memories gak ngan gelang tue.. huhuhu… makin tak sabar nak balik kampong plak.. nak cari crystal lagi huhuhu…..

Thank you nurul cover jaga Directorat hari ni…. Sowie Dato tak reti guna e-tiket tue silap print plak.. huhuhu…Lily ben rasa kene blanja ko makan NASIK AYAM ler…tak pun Satay Kajang….*huhuhuhu…..

Lewat gilos masuk opis, tapi result hari ni semua ok…. Semua mengembirakan ben… I cherish today…. Wah gitew…..huhuhu… seharian takde suara ni teringin nak gi Karaoke… Cam ner min? zain? Huhuhu Red Box? Boleh??? Huhuhu…

Pe2 pun hari ni Penat *wink*wink* tapi still Gumbira *wink*wink*

The Huggable ben...

In Quest Of the Chicken Teriyaki Don Bento….

Other than house work, cleaning my messy but comfortable room and playing PS.. takde apa menda lain nak buat on a Saturday morning.... tetiba dapat call dari member, “ Hey wanna have a Japanase lunch?” “ yeah sure let’s find a Bento..so Gi ler Jaya Jusco sebab ada Japanese Kitchen there…Bought a fine Looking Chicken Teriyaki Bento and Onigiri bento… huhuhu… Very the nice.. tapi takde tempat nak makan sebab food court penuh.. so gi Berjaya Time Square Sebab rancang nak tengok wayang petang tue….dah beli tiket… nak tgu show.. kira nak main bowling… Lalu depan Game arcade….. Time ni kosong jer kedai tue.. member ajak…”wei aku dah lama tak main DDR ler..Jom battle!!” *DDR-Dance Dance Revolution* tengok keliling takde orang lansung…”Why not?” so this 125kg Guy went on the machine and start dancing… abis first round huhuhu…fun plak…lonjak2.. dua2 masing2 ada gaya tersendiri tak ikut sanggat pun screen huhuhu…Second round member pilih lagu yang giler skit.. kali ni siap pusing2 lagi sbb nak sanggat score kan wakakakaka….. abis second round baru perasaan.. penuh dah kedai ngan orang ramai…muka dah naik merahni…. mak aii… tak mau sambung ler ramai nyer orang tengok….. huhuhuhu….tapi still ada last round … huhuhu… JOM BABE LET GO!!! Pilih lagu latin siot…..!!!! keluar ler semua gaya latin yang ntah mana pernah nampak sebelum ni wakakakakakaka… dah siap 3^rd round tue tepukan gemuruh dari para penonton….wakakaka…hilang malu kejap… Huhuhuhuhu…best gak tapi fuh penat dow…. At least battle Double dapat ranking second… naseb baik mesin tak meletup gergasi “GORGEOUS” ni melompat-lompat diatasnya wakakakakakakakakaka…. Last-last makan bento sambil tengok wayang (Bento diseludup dalam Beg)…. Malam td tapak kaki rasa cam dah jadi mash potato siot.. wakakakakaka…….But A very nice Sarturday in June indeed..huhuhu…..

The Huggable Ben